Friday, June 9, 2006

The Day After...

Today went very well. At least I think it did.
I found out more startling things about how close I was to losing my wife. Apparently, she had already decided on divorce but was scared about being able to have the financial resources to leave me and she'd already started working on a new relationship to replace me...
GODS!!! How could I be so blind as to not see any of this? I really feel like the biggest moron on the planet at this point....
But... We had a very nice day; We spent most of the day talking and it was like the old days again. I think it was what we both needed and definitely something we need to continue doing. I mean, I've always prided myself on how well we are able to communicate and, apparently, I'd lost touch with that ability these past weeks...
I officially 'broke down' on her toward the end of the day... LOL. I'd been trying not to do so since Thursday because I was at fault in this whole thing and I wanted to be there for her but I just couldn't hold off any longer I guess. I had a good cry, though, and it gave me the opportunity to poor my heart out and really tell her how much it hurt to know that I'd caused her so much pain and anguish and that I'd been so close to losing her.
Well... I'm starting to cry again while writing this and my daughter is asking for eggs so I guess that's it for the time being. There'll be more to come, I'm sure...
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