I'll Just Leave This Here...

Jess and I celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary this year (February 8). We want to buy new rings and renew our vows next year. I'm hoping we can pull it off.

Money for Nothing, Checks for Free

...I wish!!!

I paid bills yesterday... I'm thankful that I was able to work enough overtime to do so but, at the same time, I have to wonder why, exactly, I should have to kill myself just to survive. I'm not sure how I'll pay the next round o' bills that I will have to take care of mid month because work has slowed down and I don't know if OT will be available.

Apparently, both of the jobs I applied for last month have long-since been taken by others. I never got a call on either position. I'm not sure what it is I'm doing incorrectly but I'm obviously not getting it right...

On the positive side of things, though I keep dreaming about cigarettes, I'm clean and haven't smoked for five weeks as of yesterday. I'm pretty proud of this achievement.and I look forward to the time when I can afford to get my new bicycle out of Wal Mart layaway and start getting healthy again.

Anyway, I guess that's it for now.

Staying Quit...

Well... I've made it well over the 72 hour mark without a cigarette now and they say that is the worst of it, so the rest should be fairly simple. I'm pretty proud of myself and I feel better then I have in a long time since getting off of the nicotine.

26 Hours Down, One To Go...

I've now made it 26 hours without a cigarette. Although this would probably seem like nothing to the non-addict, I'm quite proud of myself for going 26 hours without the drug I've craved and ingested for so long now.
The other half of my blog title, 'One to go' is something I've picked up from some Stop Smoking websites. They all make a very good point about quitting smoking and that is that 'forever' is a VERY LONG TIME and especially so to the withdrawl experiencing addict. It is because of this that I'm only worried about the next hour. After that hour, I'll deal with making it through the hour after that and so on.
For now, I feel pretty good though I feel half-stoned and I'm not sure what is causing it. It is probably the fact that my caffeine levels are higher now because I don't have nearly as much nicotine using up caffeine. Either way, it is an interesting feeling...

Quitting Smoking SUCKS!!!

I'm trying once again to quit smoking and it is sucking worse then I remember it from the last times. I've definitely got the DT's going on right now... I'm moody and craving cigarettes like my life depends on them....
What is the most crazy thing about quitting smoking? The fact that my brain is arguing with me.... I mean, I have caught myself rationalizing everything from bumming a drag off of a friend to buying another pack. I have to stop and tell myself no and move on. Then... 20 or so minutes later... I'm thinking of the fact that one cigarette won't hurt... GAH!!!
It is definitely tough, but I'm nearing the 20 hour mark with no cigarettes, so I'm doing all right. I just don't know how long I can keep arguing with myself before I finally give in to myself... LOL
Well... That's it for now... I'll update again soon.